Indestructable Hope

The parental units and I attended the Canadian University College commencement service despite the crazy weather we’ve been having here in Alberta. Apparently snow this late into the year of this “magnitude” is highly unusual. Ah well like many things in life, its all perspective.

I was touched by the words given by a retiring sociology professor who was leaving a life of over 30 years of service as a teacher and moving to Prince Edward Island. With a quiet manner she shared an experience of hers that occurred many years ago when she stood at the Wailing Wall in Jerusalem.

She had just tragically laid her young child to rest and in a desperate need to assume a level of inner control, she made the trip to Israel as part of her “planned depression” alone. As she stood with downcast eyes in front of the wall, lost in her privacy, and slowly beginning to give into her bottled up emotions, she looked up into a man’s eyes that she could only describe as being the kindest she had ever seen. He gently asked her what was wrong. She felt the dam give way within her and she poured on him all that she had tried to contain within her being. With words borne of sincere compassion he acknowledged her pain.

“If there was someone who embodied what I imagined our Lord to be like. It was him in those moments.” She stated with a slight quiver in her voice.

She stopped her story and turned to the school faculty in full regalia sitting behind her and then to the graduating students that sat in front of her and thanked them for providing her with such joy and fulfillment over the years. She said she would miss them and also being on the campus of CUC. She could barely think of leaving them now. However her heart called to her beyond the mountains and after years of leading she was now ready to follow.

“My heart opened at the Wall. And now I’m following it to P.E.I. Where I will spend the rest of my days with the man whose eyes still look at me with such compassion. My soulmate. My husband.”

Later in the evening I ran across a poem hidden in one of my friend’s blogs. It was the only entry. Originally lifted from a song by the great Sinatra, it summed up my thoughts and feelings and is a perfect reaction to what I had experienced earlier in the day. I leave it with you now.


Each time I see a crowd of people
Just like a fool I stop and stare
It's really not the proper thing to do
But maybe you'll be there

I go out walking after midnight
Along the lonely thoroughfare
It's not the time or place
To look for you

But maybe you'll be there
You said your arms would always hold me
You said your lips were mine alone to kiss
Now after all those things you told me
How can it end like this

Someday if all my prayers are answered
I'll hear a footstep on the stair
With anxious heart I'll hurry to the door
And maybe you'll
Be there

Maybe You'll Be There

Introducing Sound of Worship

I’d like to introduce to you a wonderful group of talented younglings that I know as my extended family based in Brampton, Ontario who call themselves Sound of Worship.

It is a classic story. Take a group of rambunctious kids with a whole lot of energy and pair them up with a bunch of musical instruments and what you might end up with is a bunch of senseless noise. But add to the ingredients fervent dedication, make praising God the focus of their efforts, give them some time, and what you might end up with is something truly special. Almost 4 years ago Sound of Worship began with one guitar, a keyboard, 3 chords, and the truth. Now they are a band with their own take on Contemporary Christian Praise Music. What was once simple noise is now a unified sound. A sound dedicated to lifting up and glorifying the name of Jesus. A Sound of Worship.

Sound of Worship is:

Addison (Lead Singer & Lead Guitarist)
Gabriel (Background Vocals & Backup Guitar)
Majoire (Background Vocals, Backup Guitar & Bass Guitar)
Lily (Background Vocals & Keyboards)
Christian (Drums)

Kristine (General Management)

I've added a video bar on the right hand side of my blog underneath the archive section. There you can click on individual video panels that will allow you access video from Sound of Worship Crimson Studios recording sessions. Enjoy!

And of course check out their website at: www.soundofworship.ca

One

Reaching Out My Hand...

Since I've been contemplating the ideas of flight, freedom, and release I thought I'd post one of my favorite poems written by a pilot. I cherish the final line. I hope it lifts your spirit as it did mine. This is by John Gillespie Magee, Jr. a British pilot who wrote this during the Battle of Britain. 3 months after writing this he would die in his Spitfire in the very skies he speaks of. He was 19.

High Flight

Oh, I have slipped the surly bonds of earth
And danced the skies on laughter-silvered wings;
Sunward I've climbed, and joined the tumbling mirth
Of sun-split clouds — and done a hundred things
You have not dreamed of — wheeled and soared and swung
High in the sunlit silence.
Hov'ring there,I've chased the shouting wind along, and flung
My eager craft through footless halls of air.
Up, up the long, delirious burning blue
I've topped the windswept heights with easy grace
Where never lark, or ever eagle flew.
And, while with silent, lifting mind
I've trod the high untrespassed sanctity of space,
Put out my hand, and touched the face of God.

Dreams of Flight...

I often find it hard to acknowledge my human side even though it displays itself so prominently in the way I seem to deal with life’s challenges. This well, shrouded by doubt and rotting desperation, runs deep. I have feared that if it were somehow turned upside down, I would drown in a downpour of insane negative thoughts and emotions. I have learned to steel myself against the storm. Coldness is my new warmth. Yet the thoughts continue to invade the silence and I indulge them.

Is there truly something that exists that is the definition of pure love? Or is the thing that eluded us truly what we need? Are those who claim to have found it just partnered with those who are yet to learn that it all is a dream? Why reach out when your vulnerability simply makes you look the fool.

“I am a rock in the raging sea. “I begin to mumble. “No one shall destroy me. I stand alone.”

But in my fortress of solitude a truth creeps into the cracks. It is through human connection that we learn most of our life’s lessons. Often by laying naked together we see the truth about each other; we learn how to deal with our doubt, fear and yes even desperation. Our starving being feeds on moments of understanding and acceptance.

But oh the risk! Oh the possibility of re-opened wounds!

But when was learning ever truly safe? The journey to first flight truly began with the first crash. And yet humankind eventually flew and flew well.

Can I break down these walls in a day? Walls carved by my own hands. Can I bare my soul in all its beauty and ugliness again? Can we all?

Sometimes it is possible. But more often than not, the healing takes time filled with steps forward, backward, sideways, and sometimes we may even trip and fall.

Why then do you we get up again? What motivates us to do so?

The final words of a fallen anti-hero ring true “It is far better to have loved than to not have loved at all”. What is life if we never dare to soar close to the sun?

Icarus dared and fell to his death. But in those brief moments of flight, he lived.

Lest I Forget...

As the sun makes its way over the western horizon this evening, another week’s end slowly descends upon Red Deer, and I find myself in a reflective mood. After a brief reprieve of a week, I am once again in class with yet another graduate course to conquer. I have attacked this class with the aggression of an over-achiever, (who in the early days would simply be called a nerd) and hope my focus does not waiver even though all I see is a sea of typing APA style papers ahead. I must confess that I sometimes wonder if it will all pay off although every statistic that I have come across predicts that adult education is part of the preverbal wave of an already occurring future. Still, experience dictates that I never let caution fall by the wayside.


I found some old pictures from my early days at Andrews University. Wow you don’t realize how much you age till you run into these shots. Seeing them also caused me to reflect on my life decisions. I wonder how things would have turned out had my friends and I chosen different roads to travel regarding everything from work to love. Where would we all be? Who would we be with? Did we even know that we were making pivotal decisions when we were making them? It is easy to get lost in the land of what ifs.


As one who believes in a God and who has chosen this journey of reconnection, I am re-learning that every event in life has its purpose and place as does everyone. Too often we expel energy holding on to things or forcing things away when we need to learn to simply accept and learn from each moment. I speak as one who has yet to master these things. Thankfully mercy and love are always chasing me to offer me clarity on how to handle the challenges on life’s road. Maybe in all this quietness I am finally learning. At least hope, the essential, is still in me.

One

Flock Scam ALERT!

The Edmonton Police Department has posted a public notice to citizens to be aware of what they have labeled: The FLOCK Scam. Police say that a gang usually comprised of 4 members, 1 adult and 3 adolescent is involved. While the three younger criminals use sweetness and an innocent attitude to divert their ‘mark’ (intended target) the adult sneaks in from behind the victim’s back to expertly rifle through their belongings (usually a purse or pocket).

By digitally enhancing video footage confiscated in a recent raid, the E.P.D. has been able to render the attached photograph which they hope will aid in the apprehension of participants in this scam. The police have the victim's permssion to display her face.

Should you or your family members recognize members of a FLOCK gang, do not give in to the cuteness. Please relay this information to this hotline: 1 800 END FLOC.

Story inspired by Joy Casey.

Astana Not To Ride in 2008 Tour...

I was really disappointed when I found out that the Astana Pro Cycling team was barred from entering this year’s Tour De France for two reasons. 1. Two of my favorite riders who are both former Discovery Channel team members, last year’s tour winner Alberto Contador and final time trial winner Levi Leipheimer, will not be riding. 2. Trek Bicycle Company, the leading American bicycle technology innovator and a dominant presence in the tour for the last decade, will also be missing.

For those of you who are not in the know about cycling history, this current Astana team has deep roots running as far back as Team Motorola and the mighty U.S. Postal lead by Lance Armstrong with Johan Bruyneel directing. When Discovery Channel lost its key sponsor in 2007, the heartbreaking news that the team would be disbanding was softened by Johan’s decision to assume the reins of control for Astana. His decision brought to the floundering Astana the mechanism that formed the foundation of the string of yellow success for U.S. Postal as well as the technological know how of Trek. Not to mention the willing discipleship of Johan’s school of racing in Levi and Alberto.

However the excitement all this movement instigated could not hide Astana’s chalky past with the memory of former rider Alexander Vinokourov’s failure of anti-doping testing in last years tumultuous tour. The 2008 tour’s governing body appears to be holding up their ruling that Astana not be allowed to attend even though other teams that have had similar problems are riding. This has been interpreted by many to be outright snobbery of the American managed team, and the loophole the tour organizers have been waiting to use to exclude what they consider to be an annoyance in the sport.

Astana seems to be handling the news well with a possible good reason. Being excluded from the tour gives the team one full year to train and master cohesion. The team has already demonstrated its ability to win races such as Levi’ s victory in the Tour of California. Inadvertantly the tour’s organizers may have given the team motivation to comeback with authority in 2009.

Pictures provided by Trek and Team Astana.

Chapter 3 Two Words and The Truth...

I experienced a deeper understanding of what my Dad’s work entailed over this trip. To call it “work” is a misnomer; a better definition is based in the idea of a “life of service”. Over the years I’ve been jaded by the state of Christianity and all the clichés that surround this belief system. But to observe the way my Dad attacks each early morning and long highway drive with an enthusiasm to share his beliefs through his actions and overall conduct, truly impresses me. Something has to be right spiritually for someone to live their life like this.

My father often speaks of the importance of compassion in the equation of how we are to associate with our fellowmen. He points out that the root word found in compassion is passion. He believes that our caring for the well-being of our fellowmen should be authentic. Our compassion should be a burning fire that drives us to do so with all of what we have in us. The way he puts things, it would seem that were it the last thing he would be doing in this life, caring for someone who is in need, then it would be a fitting end. This is what selflessness means to him and yet it is the attribute that real self-esteem is built on.

On a particularly long stretch of highway we discussed the importance of prayer as being the essence of a spiritual connection to God. In fact it is the essence of any spirituality. He pointed that other belief systems practice prayer even those that do not believe in God. While reading Bible and other sacred writings would greatly aid in revealing God to us, it is when we pray that we can experience Him. My father truly believes that things happen when we reach out in honestly, humbleness, and faith. According to him, this is where the relationship begins.

It dawned on me as we returned to Red Deer that he had summed up the foundation of Christianity: love God and love one another. The sum of all preaching, writing, and singing can be contained in two words: prayer and compassion.

As human beings we tend to complicate our lives. We are masters of self destruction through our habits, thought patterns, and desires. We even tend to cloud the noble belief systems we claim to follow by our own doing. Could it be that the truth is far simpler?

As simple as two words?

Chapter 2 All Over God's Brown Earth...

We awoke on Sunday morning and were greeted with 5 cm of snow. As compared to the splurging of the night before, this morning’s meal was simple: ramen noodles and orange juice. Packing was hurried because we had quite the drive to make and the weather was definitely not cooperative. Our Pontiac G5 slid a couple of times as we headed onto the highway while the digital readout on the car's dash flashed the obvious “Possible Ice Conditions”.

Medicine Hat (2 hours past Strathmore)

Medicine Hat is considered to be the “Florida” of Canada. Many Canadians come to retire here during their twilight years. Judging by the cars I saw on the road and the homes we saw perched on the hills; it was easy to conclude that these individuals were pretty well off. I counted 5 BMW X5s within 5 minutes of each other.

We were here for another Town Hall Meeting to be held at the local church school. I was impressed to learn that due to generous funding provided by local church members, this K – 8 school offered free schooling to all limited only to available seating.

The meeting lasted three hours and I was starving. Fortunately they had prepared a lunch for us and after many years I was plunged into a vegetarian SDA meal! Yes complete with Soya blueberry cheese cake! That stuff was mmm mmm good!

Calgary Filipino Company (3.5 hours back to Calgary)

A Company is a group of individuals who meet regularly for church on Sabbath in the hopes of becoming an official church. They usually have a more official name but this one escapes me as I write this. My father and the financial vice president had to meet with the governing board to discuss some financial issues.

This Company had the youngest governing board I have ever met. Most of them were in their mid to late twenties. The group was being supervised by a college mate of mine: Andrew Roque. Although the nature of the meeting was serious, we managed to catch up and I promised to help him with the plans for this summer's Filipino Camp meeting.

Red Deer (11 pm)

We arrive home and collapse into bed... zzzzz...

Chapter 1 Here to There and Back Again...

One of the reasons I came to Alberta is to re-connect with my Dad. I find it funny that when I relate this to people, they react with surprise mixed with a bit of skepticism. Why after all this time would I want to do that? It doesn’t really bother me. I figure there are many fatherless young men out there who still wish for five more minutes with their Dad. I feel I’m lucky to realize that such an opportunity is something a son should never pass up.

This past weekend, I rode shotgun with my father as he embarked on a road trip to visit churches amongst the smaller towns in rural Alberta. While he makes it a point to go to these churches simply to promote solidarity between the local church and the administrative conference, he also loves to meet people and connect with them on a personal level.

What a follows is a brief breakdown of specific places we visited on the trip. It was a lengthy trip so I’ve split this entry into 3 parts. Chapter 1 being the coverage of the Sabbath leg of the trip. Chapter 2 being coverage of the Sunday leg. And Chapter 3 will contain my reflections on the trip.

Strathmore Alberta. (4 hrs away from Red Deer)

I couldn’t help but feel like we were in a western movie as we rolled into the little town of Strathmore. This is town with a main street barely 1 km long with the bank, police station, courthouse, and liquor store all on the same corner.

9 people attended the church service, 2 of them being my Dad and I. And Dad preached and taught Sabbath school with the same enthusiasm that he would had there been three hundred people in attendance. This spoke to me on a deep level.

Calgary Metro Filipino (2 hours backtracking from Strathmore)

We headed back to Calgary to try to catch potluck at the Calgary Metro Filipino church. Alas it was their day of fasting and prayer! The church is made up of young newcomers straight from the Philippines filled with dreams of prosperity. A chance to sponsor their families back in the homeland once they have their affairs in order drives them. Predominantly female caregivers they were already picking up on the North American way of life.

After an AY progam, (yes AY, short for Adventist Youth) we took a twenty minute drive to visit some property that the group was looking to purchase to build a church on. The gentleman who owned the property was a self-employed engineer who fabricates custom construction parts for the contractors around Alberta. He was a Filipino version of West Coast Choppers complete with the tricked out Hummer he purchased to look at to keep him motivated!

Calgary Central (1/5 hr into the city)

This apparently is the largest Seventh-Day Adventist (SDA) church in Calgary. We sat through an amazing lecture given by a certain Dr. Barnard who spoke on the benefits of the Vegan Diet. I know what your thinking but this guy’s only nutty attribute was that he was way too smart! I actually enjoyed it and learned a lot.

Immediately following the lecture we proceeded to the gym for a “Town Hall Meeting”. This is when all the administrative heads of the church conference, my Dad included, give reports to the congregation regarding the state of the church in Alberta. Any member of the SDA church in Alberta was welcome and was given the freedom to ask questions regarding these reports.

Pointes Inn (10 minutes from Calgary Central)

After deciding that $150 was a bit steep for one night at a Best Western Dad and I checked in at Pointes Inn at around 11 pm. We were exhausted but hungry and hunted down some grub at the Denny’s across the street.

Both he and I broke every rule we had learned at the health lecture earlier that evening. I ordered the midnight burger special which included a generous serving of season fries and a quarter pound burger served with egg and extra cheese! It was the first time I had eaten meat in 2 weeks. Dad had the same. Well, I figure you have to indulge every now and then.

Then it was off to bed in preparation for an early start on Sunday.